Sixteen
So here it be Friday evening, 8-ish. If I do anything tonight, it will be quite late.
The reason I'm posting a blog right now is because I burned a CD last night and I want to listen to it! It's quite the mix - 50 Cent, Beastie Boys, The Cramps, Iggy Pop, Nine Inch Nails, Stooges. I haven't listened to Pretty Hate Machine by NIN in years and years - it brings back memories of being 16 years old, which is probably why I have chosen not to listen to it in over 10 years.
My pivotal boyfriend at 16, Scott. Lost my virginity to him. We had it all planned out. He snuck out of his house, walked to my house (several miles - can't find that kind of loyalty and determination anymore...). When my parents went to work first thing in the morning, he climbed in through my bedroom window and voila! Sex for the first time. And it was so incredibly awful. Hurt like fucking hell. But I liked him so much. He wrote these truly horrific poems but he was in a bad situation; abusive father, neglectful mother. Truly sad situation. We broke up along the way - I can't remember how long it was that we broke up after we slept together - I do remember it was just that once.
Seems like he moved away shortly after. When I was 17 and about to be a senior and with J, THE ex I've mentioned here previously, Scott came back into town and went to a mutual friend's house who blew him off. Apparently he was in bad shape for whatever reason. He committed suicide soon after.
He had bought NIN's Pretty Hate Machine for me for my bday. Listening to it now brings it all back. He was so pretty. He was the only "pretty boy" I ever went for. Never before, never since.
Wow! Now it's Faith No More's "Falling to Pieces." This song brings back high school, too. Best friend S had moved 25 miles away and was now at a new school. My folks would drive me to her house on Sat and drop me to spend the night, where we would watch MTV religiously and talk about guys and music and moving away and hate our parents. She was totally into this guy at her church (she was forced to go - it was so not of her own volition) and I was totally into this guy that went to her school that she befriended. He was definitely not a pretty boy. If I saw him now, I would not be the slightest bit attracted to him...funny how that works. I would have hacked off an arm to be with him when I was 16!
Alright, final song is ending. High school memories are over now, goodnight. And for that, we can all be grateful.
The reason I'm posting a blog right now is because I burned a CD last night and I want to listen to it! It's quite the mix - 50 Cent, Beastie Boys, The Cramps, Iggy Pop, Nine Inch Nails, Stooges. I haven't listened to Pretty Hate Machine by NIN in years and years - it brings back memories of being 16 years old, which is probably why I have chosen not to listen to it in over 10 years.
My pivotal boyfriend at 16, Scott. Lost my virginity to him. We had it all planned out. He snuck out of his house, walked to my house (several miles - can't find that kind of loyalty and determination anymore...). When my parents went to work first thing in the morning, he climbed in through my bedroom window and voila! Sex for the first time. And it was so incredibly awful. Hurt like fucking hell. But I liked him so much. He wrote these truly horrific poems but he was in a bad situation; abusive father, neglectful mother. Truly sad situation. We broke up along the way - I can't remember how long it was that we broke up after we slept together - I do remember it was just that once.
Seems like he moved away shortly after. When I was 17 and about to be a senior and with J, THE ex I've mentioned here previously, Scott came back into town and went to a mutual friend's house who blew him off. Apparently he was in bad shape for whatever reason. He committed suicide soon after.
He had bought NIN's Pretty Hate Machine for me for my bday. Listening to it now brings it all back. He was so pretty. He was the only "pretty boy" I ever went for. Never before, never since.
Wow! Now it's Faith No More's "Falling to Pieces." This song brings back high school, too. Best friend S had moved 25 miles away and was now at a new school. My folks would drive me to her house on Sat and drop me to spend the night, where we would watch MTV religiously and talk about guys and music and moving away and hate our parents. She was totally into this guy at her church (she was forced to go - it was so not of her own volition) and I was totally into this guy that went to her school that she befriended. He was definitely not a pretty boy. If I saw him now, I would not be the slightest bit attracted to him...funny how that works. I would have hacked off an arm to be with him when I was 16!
Alright, final song is ending. High school memories are over now, goodnight. And for that, we can all be grateful.
1 Comments:
That was pretty strong. I think I blanked out most of my highschool days. I know a few of my class mates committed suicide.
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